The Pine Tar Game

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Today marks the 32nd Anniversary of the infamous ‘Pine Tar Game’ between the Kansas City Royals and the New York Yankees. To celebrate this memorable game, I decided to watch the entire game. I realized once I started, that watching a game from 1983 was amusing to say the least. So with that said, here is a thoughts column on a game that will forever live in baseball lore.

  • Ooooooo, 80’s graphics! My son couldn’t grasp why the graphics were so bad. I told him that was the best we had at the time. He said that was sad.
  • Bert Campaneris was still playing in 1983?
  • The Yankees announcers are horrid. Yes, it was a different period, and I realize that. But it’s amazing to listen to just how bad the commentary was back in this era. There is literally no statistical analysis at all. In fact, Phil Rizzuto has discussed so far moustaches, buttons on the jersey and the tobacco in Leon Roberts mouth. The sad part is they are probably on par with Steve Physioc. Yes, Phys is that bad.
  • I realized this when I watched the 1985 World Series recently, but I have really gotten used to having all the information on the screen during the game. The only part that drives me crazy is not being able to see the score and outs at all times! We sometimes tease that there can be too much information on the screen but at the same time it has become a vital part of our baseball watching experience.
  • Steve Balboni without a moustache is blasphemous. Although without the lip hair he has a passing resemblance to John Belushi.
  • U.L. Washington still has his toothpick in his mouth. The. Entire. Time.
  • I almost forgot Don Slaught spent some time in Kansas City. I keep picturing Slaught with that guard covering his face after he had gotten hit in the face later in his career.
  • Since I didn’t see Dave Winfield until later in his career, I think I forgot just how crazy athletic he was. He is playing center field in this game and a few innings in it makes total sense.
  • Trash talking on Municipal Stadium in Cleveland…beautiful!
  • John Wathan should be in the Royals Hall of Fame. Yes, Wathan wasn’t a great player, but he was a solid part of these Royals teams in the 80’s and has stayed in the organization throughout the years, whether he was managing or scouting. To me, Wathan is a guy transcends any numbers he compiled in his career.
  • Frank White was pretty damn graceful on defense. I don’t think I am saying anything you didn’t already know.
  • There is a lot more discussion in the broadcast about strategy and I like that. Part of the beauty of baseball is the mental back and forth that goes on between the two teams as they decide what is their best move in a close game.
  • Skoal Bandit tote bag day at Yankee Stadium? Pretty sure you wouldn’t get a tobacco company to sponsor any giveaway at the stadium in this day and age.
  • Lou Piniella(seriously, I thought he had retired yyyyyyyyyears before this) made a catch that was very reminiscent of Nori Aoki. In fact the route Piniella took was straight out of Aoki’s playbook.
  • There has been some talk about the Royals needing pitching. Within a year of this game, the Royals would have Bret Saberhagen and Mark Gubicza, two young pitchers in their farm system, in the majors. By 1985 you can add Danny Jackson to that list. Pitching was a big part of that 1985 championship team.
  • There aren’t enough pitchers who throw sidearm in the majors these days. Take note, youngsters.
  • Don Baylor scares me. I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t want to meet him in a dark alley in the 80’s. I’m pretty sure I still wouldn’t want to today.
  • Let’s go to replay…oh yeah, they don’t have that yet…
  • Every generic 80’s song used for these games used a synthesizer. People loved their moog’s back in the 80’s.
  • Amos Otis might be one of the most underrated players in Royals history. He wouldn’t quite be on the Royals ‘Mount Rushmore’, but he would be pretty damn close.
  • Don Mattingly as a defensive replacement? Wonder if Balboni was higher on their depth chart in 1983.
  • I know it’s Rizzuto, but do you need to ask whether or not Willie Mays Aikens was named after Willie Mays?
  • Brett vs. Gossage is such a classic matchup. Is the modern day equivalent Aroldis Chapman vs. Bryce Harper or Mike Trout?
  • Brett just seemed so locked in there against Goose. It seemed like no matter what Brett was going to drive a pitch during that at bat.
  • If you are a lip reader, don’t watch George’s mouth after he runs out. I noticed a plethora of four letter words spewing from his mouth.

 

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The funny thing about this game is that this situation will never happen again. The whole reason the pine tar rule was even in the rulebook was so the tar wouldn’t muck up the baseballs. Having pine tar on the bat does absolutely nothing to the ball if hit. This game is now one of the most famous games in history and will probably be discussed for hundreds of years to come. If you want to know more about the game, there is a new book out this week called “The Pine Tar Game: The Kansas City Royals, The New York Yankees and Baseball’s Most Absurd and Entertaining Controversy” by Filip Bondy. You can get it on Amazon by clicking here. You can also watch this game in its entirety down below. Trust me, it is worth your time.

 

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Sure, Your Promotional Schedule is Okay, But…

promotionsYep, I’m one of those fans. Every year when the baseball schedule comes out, I eagerly await the promotional schedule put out by the Kansas City Royals, and to a degree, base my going to the ballpark around it. There are exceptions, but if there is something I really want, I make sure to try and be at that game. Looking at the 2013 promotional schedule, I felt very underwhelmed. Sure, the Billy Butler bobblehead is a fantastic idea, and should have been done a long time ago. I always love when the A’s come to town and the Royals pay homage to the old Kansas City A’s. But looking past those items this year, the promotions are sorely lacking. Does any self respecting fan think they need a mustard, relish and ketchup bobblehead? They would just seem out of place on my shelf with Carlos Beltran and Joakim Soria. A cooler that looks like a gun case? A scarf on Mother’s Day? To save Royals management, I, free of charge, will give them some ideas for promotions. Granted, the schedule has already been made, but these can be used in the future. Or you can make your own. Whatever. I just came up with ideas. Here we go.

1) Mike Moustakas Powder Blue Dirt Shirt

mooseYou might be wondering what this even means. Well, as you can tell from the above picture, Mike “Moose” Moustakas is known for getting quite dirty while out on the field. To celebrate his likeness with Pigpen, the Royals could have a powder blue shirt for Moose with dirt on the shirt. Well, not REAL dirt, but it would look like dirt. The Royals did this a few years ago with a George Brett shirt, putting what looked like pine tar on a powder blue shirt. It looked like this:

Brett_shirtPretty cool, huh? Do this same kind of shirt with Moose, add some dirt, and the fans will flock. It also promotes one of your younger fan favorites, which they should be pushing more, in my opinion. If that doesn’t work, make a Moose stuffed animal that when you press its feet it makes the “Moooooooose” cheer you hear from the fans at the ballpark.

2)Anything with Bo Jackson

bo_openingdayAll these years later, and Bo Jackson is just as wildly popular in Kansas City as he was during his prime. Bo knows popularity. ESPN’s 30 for 30 on Bo was one of the most talked about in a long time and brought Bo back to the forefront of everyone’s mind. Jackson even made an appearance in Kansas City at the celebrity softball game during the All Star Game festivities this past year. So what better time to jump on the Bo bandwagon then now? Now, what you do with the promotion doesn’t matter. Bo sells himself. Bo knows variety. Bo bobblehead. Bo replica jersey. Bo camo hat(I think Bo would dig this). Bo cooler. Bo doggy outfit for Bark at the Park day. Make Bo show up to race mustard, ketchup, and relish(seriously, who thinks they can outrun Bo??). Bo knows condiments. You literally could do anything involving Bo Jackson, and it would be a winner. Jackson was one of the most popular players in Royals history, so it seems only fitting to somehow make him a promotion at some point. Safe to say I will be at the ballpark that day. Bo knows Sean still thinks he is great.

3) Negro League Video Night

negroleaguesbaseballmuseum006aalrOne promotion that is always a plus for Kansas City is the night they honor the Negro Leagues. The players dress up in the old uniforms, and throughout the night they honor the old Negro League players. But with the Negro League Baseball Museum in Kansas City, they can take it a step further. Put together a video of the history of the Negro Leagues. Give it away to the first 5,000-10,000 fans that come to the ballpark. Make them realize not only how fascinating this era was but how great these players really were. This is a win/win, as the Royals get a great promotional night, while putting out some plugs for the museum. This should be a partnership that helps both sides and seems like a perfect match.

4) Girls Night Out Photo Night(AKA Quit being drunk ass idiots at the ballpark)

7-2220girlsThe Royals Girls Night Out is one of the team’s highest attended promotions. It is also one that I dread every year. Every year, a bunch of women flock to Kaufman Stadium for this yearly event and a large portion end up sloppy messes by the end of the night. Sure, who doesn’t love their women to be loud, abrasive and completely unaware of their surroundings? I’m sorry, but when I got to a ballgame, I want to sit back, enjoy the action and pay attention to what is happening on the field. On Girls Night Out, that isn’t possible. No, on Girls Night Out, I have to listen to these drunk women blather on about their pitiful lives and how men have done them wrong. Then, if you are sitting anywhere near them, you have to get up every 10-15 minutes to let them out so they can either go pee/get more drinks/find their other friends who can’t find them. I’m sorry your bladder is full, Cindy Jo, but can I please just watch the damn game? So my idea is to have a photo night about a month before Girls Night Out, handing out photos to all these women, showing them for the drunken messes they were the previous year. Sure, it probably won’t do any good. I mean, they will probably just find it funny and continue to make a horse’s ass out of themselves like they do every year. But maybe, just maybe–someone will realize how embarrassing it is and decide to stop after two beers instead of seven. I can only pray. I just want to watch the game. That is why we pay for a ticket, correct?

5) More Bobblehead Nights(of actual players, not condiments)

royalsbobbleheads Anyone who knows me knows that I love bobbleheads. Baseball bobbleheads are even better. Over the years, the Royals bobbleheads have been fantastic, and if you take a second to hop on over to ebay, you find most of these there, granted for a hefty price(except for Larry Gura. Sorry, Larry!). The Billy Butler one this year looks great. But the condiments are an awful, awful idea. All these years of great Royals players, and they are bumped for the stuff I put on my hot dogs? It’s not hard, guys. Amos Otis doesn’t have a bobblehead. Great player back in the day, former All Star and a vital part of the championship Royals teams. Seems like a slam dunk. Hal McRae? Another good choice. I could literally go on forever. Mark Gubicza, Al Cowens, Kevin Seitzer, Jeff Montgomery, and Kevin Appier just to name a few of the players from the past. Hey, just look at the here and now. Alcides Escobar, Salvador Perez, a miniature Johnny Giavotella, or Bruce Chen. Sure, I don’t particularly like Jeff Francoeur, but if they had a bobblehead of him with an actual cannon for an arm, I would want it(thank you for leading me to that idea, Anna). It is so simple. It is also an easy way to get me to the ballpark. Let’s make a deal now, Royals promotion department; no condiments next year. Worst. Idea. Ever.

6) Disco Demolition Night

discoMaybe this time it will end different…

…and if not, can we destroy every existing copy of ‘Friends in Low Places’?

garthGod, I hate that song. Make it go away. Forever.

So those are just a few ideas. I can only hope that for 2014, the Royals step up and give us promotions worth being proud of. If not, we will have our own Royals promotional night at my house. For a fee, of course. I’m not just giving away those Ned Yost shirts I have tucked away in my closet…

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